Lauren Perpetua
Senior Resources

Mothering Your Mother

By Lauren Perpetua, MBA
Sunday is Mother’s Day, and we want to honor all the mommas out there. Being a mother is not only one of the most important jobs, but it is also one of the hardest. Being a mother requires a lot of adaptability as the job evolves as your children grow. Every phase is just that […]
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Grandparents at Holidays

Sunday is Mother’s Day, and we want to honor all the mommas out there. Being a mother is not only one of the most important jobs, but it is also one of the hardest. Being a mother requires a lot of adaptability as the job evolves as your children grow. Every phase is just that – a phase – and as quickly as you master the new phase, your child will inevitably evolve into a new one. It can be tricky, at times unthankful, but always worth it. The funny thing is, no matter what age your child is, you never stop being a mom… until you do.

A few years ago, we unexpectedly lost my father-in-law. At the time, it was not only tragic because it was unexpected, but it was also tragic because my mother-in-law had never really lived without her husband. Learning to live a new life, coupled with the deep pain of losing her husband, caused my mother-in-law a lot of grief. 

Very quickly, her relationship with myself and my husband (her son) changed. Her health has begun to deteriorate, and over the years, she went from being an asset in our support system, helping with our kids from time to time, to another person we have to support.

As a mother myself, I have learned that I am in a new phase of motherhood, a phase where I am mothering my mother-in-law. This, like other phases of motherhood, is evolving as my mother-in-law ages. A few months ago, we were helping her with groceries, and now we are evolving into taking over her bills. I am learning my new role as her support system, and much like parenting my children, I am learning how to best support her without diminishing her independence. 

I know I am not alone, and many members of the sandwich generation are mothering their mothers. It is something that we don’t often hear about, especially around Mother’s Day. Social media is often filled with photos of mothers with their children, pristine and posing, but we rarely see a mother celebrated for caring for her mother. So, on this year’s Mother’s Day, we are thinking about all forms of motherhood and how it looks. We see you, the sandwich generation. We know it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. We know there’s always a new phase, a new skill to master, and a new boundary to set or cross, and we are here for it. We are your support system.

Learn more about how we can help here. Happy Mother’s Day! 


Lauren Perpetua

Lauren Perpetua, MBA

Lauren is the Chief Strategy Officer for Sunways Senior Living Concierge. She is passionate about connecting caregivers with resources needed to navigate the aging process of their loved ones.


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